How Far is Too Far? Dating Insights to Share with Your Daughter

How Far is Too Far? Dating Insights to Share with Your Daughter. Girls just wanna have fun, but how far is too far? Momma, it’s time to prepare yourself to have this talk with your daughter. And the timing to have this conversation is more urgent than you might think  

“Choose Wisely” is a message taught by Rhonda Stoppe at a Choose Wisely Conference @ Big Valley Grace Church in Modesto California Single’s Conference.

Please consider sharing this episode with your teen daughter or single young adult friends. 

Choosing wisely a godly spouse is the single most important decision your child can make- outside of their surrender to Christ. Mom, it’s your job to have these conversations with your daughter.

Momma- Don’t forsake this calling because you’re uncomfortable talking about s*x and purity with your kids. The world is more than happy to influence your daughters with their view. So ask God for courage and equip yourself to have this all important talk with your daughter. 

Purity. True Love Waits  

Book Mentioned

Real Life Romance by Rhonda Stoppe

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Transcript

Rhonda Stoppe [00:00:00]:
Thanks so much for being here. I'm excited. How many of you are morning people? Okay. Well, I'm not. So I've had a lot of coffee, and I'm excited that y'all are here. And, I wanna pray and we're gonna jump right in. Father, thank you. Thank you.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:00:19]:
That you know each one of us by name, that you know our story, every single one of us. You know the longings of our heart. You know our hurts. You know our hopes. Oh, let us just rest in the knowledge of you and in your adoration for us. Guide me as I share what you've put on my heart, quiet our minds, and help us to hear from you this morning. In Jesus name, amen. Amen.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:00:59]:
Okay. I'm gonna read some stories from did you all get a copy of Real Life Romance? It's such a fun book, you guys. It's like a chicken soup for the soul. You can read any chapter in the book and get all the feels. But today, we're gonna just read some of the stories out of this book and and do a little bit of application from those. The first one starts with a girl named Jillian. Jillian recalled, the few hours of driving to meet Nate's parents were really sweaty for me. I was so nervous.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:01:32]:
Here's this guy who loves the Lord and gives me butterflies. I never thought that I would deserve a guy like him because my dating record was not the best. Some of you might relate to Jillian's story. Nate noticed the awkward silence in the car. So he broke the silence and he said, I like you. But I wanna keep it to a friendship because dating just adds physical pressure that isn't necessary. And I promised myself I'm not gonna tell another girl I love her unless I'm gonna marry her. Nate then made a statement that took Jillian's breath away.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:02:09]:
He said, the next girlfriend I have will be my wife, and I don't even wanna kiss another girl until I know she's gonna be my wife. In reaction to what Nate said, it was Jillian who could do I'm sorry. I'm gonna read that again. In reaction to what Nate had just said, it was all Jillian could do not to let her jaw drop open. She composed herself and she told Nate that she agreed that their relationship should remain the same. But inwardly, she was thinking, how can this guy like me? That evening, Jillian enjoyed meeting his family and the next day they went on a hike and all the while she was carrying this huge weight. She thought, if this guy really likes me, he needs to know my story. With every ounce of courage that Jillian could muster, she stopped dead in her tracks and she revealed to Nate her darkest secret.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:03:12]:
Nate, I'm not a virgin. With her eyes on the path in front of her because she was too ashamed to look Nate in the eye, She went on, I didn't listen to God. Even though I knew what was right, I didn't obey. Jillian held her breath waiting for Nate's response. She thought, here's this godly guy who does not even wanna kiss a woman unless they're gonna be married. What's he gonna say? And then she raised her eyes and she looked deep into Nate's eyes, and he said, have you have you repented? Did you ask God to forgive you? And Jillian said, yeah. Yeah. I have.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:04:01]:
And Nate simply responded, then I forgive you too. And he continued walking down the path. Yay, Nate. Right? There's Nate in this world, y'all. I know them. They're awesome.

Speaker B [00:04:20]:
I'm gonna skip down and

Rhonda Stoppe [00:04:21]:
I'm gonna just read this part. I am so glad that we made the effort to seek out premarital counseling. This is what Jillian said. Because what we learned was so valuable and saving s*x for our wedding night gave us a bond that was deeper than any physical attraction. Maybe some of you in here have not followed God's plan for purity. The the topic of this message is girls just wanna have fun, but what does the Bible say? And maybe some of you have taken a walk on the wild side. And maybe some of you have stuff that even as I'm talking about this right now, your shame trigger has just gone. Yeah.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:05:03]:
That's me. I don't deserve a guy like Nate. I don't deserve a guy that is gonna be a godly husband or godly spouse. Who's gonna want me once they know where I've been? And I love this story because God redeems us to the utmost. But let's talk a little bit about what the world says because the world says, go have fun. You're young, have fun. And maybe you're, you know, young is such a you're single, let's say that. You're single, have fun.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:05:34]:
It's not about age, it's about the singleness and what is allowed in our culture. But what does god say? Well, number one, God says, it's all s*x. Steve and I do premarital counseling for couples and we take them through six weeks and week six is so they don't have weak s*x. And we talk about the physical aspect of having a great s*x life. Did you know that God invented s*x? The devil didn't do it. God did. He created s*xual intimacy to be enjoyed in the marriage bed. And sadly, Christians who should be having some of the best s*x on the planet are like, it's Tuesday.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:06:18]:
I guess we should do that thing we do. And they're missing because they don't understand how God created our bodies to enjoy s*x in the marriage bed. But as you walk through the steps to have a really enjoyable s*xual experience with your spouse, what you realize is it's all s*x. All of that stuff that you do up until the point where you're not going to go all the way, it's all s*x. God created foreplay to create our bodies to enjoy s*x in the marriage bed. But see, what happens in our culture, no matter how old you are, is I'm just going to do all those things except that. But it's all s*x. And because God is good, he knew what our bodies needed to prepare ourselves for a shameless, enjoyable, s*xual encounter with a spouse.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:07:21]:
But this is making a lot of noise, isn't it? Let's try this. Better? Maybe? So how far is too far? Like, some of you are like, you're still in high school. Some of you are like 40 and you're all like, oh, you know, I've already had s*x. I get it. I if you think you can handle a make out scene and stop, You might, once or twice. But your body that was created by God is understanding, and I love what Susie and Scott were saying, that little tiny tiny brain. Your brain gets smaller and smaller and your your decision making process becomes less and less. I can't tell you how many women I have sat across from that have said, I just I never meant to cross over that line.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:08:17]:
I never meant to do the thing that makes a baby. I remember I was raised in the '70. I'm gonna tell you how old I am because you're gonna wanna know and you're gonna try to figure it out. I'm 60. I'll be 61 on May 1. My husband and I have been married on we have been married forty one years forty one years. And, I'm here with my high school sweetheart. He's here today.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:08:35]:
I'm super excited. He's watching some of the grandkids, so my daughter can be in here. And I'm telling you that I have a lot sat across from a lot of women that were like, man, I I just never meant to I thought I could handle it. I thought I could handle it. But it's all s*x. And Hebrews thirteen four says the marriage bed is honorable, it's most precious, and it's undefiled. But when we get out of God's plan for s*xual intimacy and when we play with fire and think we can stop it when we wanna stop and I'm just gonna give you a little hint here. When you're ovulating, when you are the most fertile, you are the most horny.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:09:20]:
So don't be thinking you can have a little make out scene with somebody and you're not gonna put your brain on hold and go all the way. Because how many women did the I have I mean, youth ministry eighteen years. First time we had s*x, I got pregnant. That's because you were ovulating. Know your body and don't let it betray you. Sex is awesome in the bonds of marriage, but outside of the bonds of marriage is not blessed of God and it's not awesome. Number two, what's the big deal? Sex is a sign of a covenant. So here's the thing, and I love that Susie and Scott talked about covenant because it's not a contract.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:10:07]:
When you get married, you don't enter into a contract. You do this and I'll do that, and if it works out, we'll stay married, and if it doesn't, we'll split the sheets and go, no, no, no. You are entering into a lifelong covenant with another person for the rest of your life before God, whether they measure up to your expectations or not. And all through scripture, covenant is mentioned, and the covenant even that when we enter into a relationship with Jesus Christ as our lord and savior, we enter into a covenant. Because of his broken body, because of his blood, we can enter into a covenant and become one with our father, become a a child of the most high God. And in the Bible, but it talks about remember, some of you might not know, you know, all the how come we're talking

Speaker B [00:10:58]:
about s*x in the Bible?

Rhonda Stoppe [00:10:59]:
I don't get it. You know, because God created it. Adam I mean, I'm sorry, Abraham. God said, I'm gonna cut a covenant with Abraham. Culturally back then, you would divide flesh and then two people when they made a covenant, they would walk between the flesh and they would say, let this happen to me if I break this covenant with you. And so when God went into a covenant with Abraham, he told Abraham, cut all these animals to separate them and then God caused his sleep to go on Abraham and God walked through the animals because God was going to keep the covenant no matter what Abraham did because he's a covenant keeping God. But it was passing through the flesh was the sign of the covenant. Where am I going with this? Intercourse is a sign of your marriage covenant.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:11:41]:
It is a passing through the flesh as a first time together on your wedding night that you become one. And then every time within the bonds of marriage, in_course is a sign of your covenant. Malachi says the two share one soul. I don't know how that works. But see, we have lost such sight of what a covenant is and we have lost such sight of what s*x is that we miss that when you're having s*x with someone that is not your spouse, that you're not in a lifelong covenant with, it is a mockery of the sign of the marriage covenant. Did you know that that is why, same s*x attraction interact that is why that is such a mockery. Sodomy is a mockery because Satan imitated God's covenant in marriage that was good and he made a mockery of it. It's all s*x and it's a sign of your covenant.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:12:52]:
First Corinthians six sixteen reminds us when we join our body with another through s*x that the two shall become one flesh. Sex outside of marriage makes a mockery of that. See, Satan knows that when God's people are caught in s*xual sin, it renders them powerless for his kingdom. We'll talk more about that in a minute. Number three, when you have gone too far. The consequences of going too far. We're gonna talk about this. Number one, the first consequence to consider is how s*xual sin quenches the Holy Spirit in your life.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:13:33]:
Consider the cost of not being spirit led. When you're making the most important decisions of your life, who are you gonna marry? Who are you gonna serve the Lord with? Who are you gonna raise children with? Let me just tell you something. You know, when that marriage is falling apart and they're like, oh, we're gonna have a baby to save the marriage. Oh, it's gonna kill your marriage. If your marriage is already falling apart and you're gonna have a baby, it's gonna be even harder because it's more about serving someone other than yourself. And when we get into a a marriage relationship is when we even realize how selfish we are. But if I'm not led by the spirit, if I'm sleeping with some guy who seems so awesome, but if I'm having s*x with him, I'm not even seeing him with the spirit's eyes to know whether he's somebody that God would have me serve the Lord with for the rest of my life. When I'm involved in a s*xual relationship with someone, I'm convinced this is my Prince Charming.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:14:41]:
And then you get married, and you realize that you married Dopey or Sleepy or Sneezy or Doc. Why didn't I see it before you got married? Because you were quenching the spirit. Because you were not being led by the spirit. That's terrifying. And I know a lot of women that have ended up married to a guy that is either a mediocre Christian or not even truly a Christian or a self proclaimed unbeliever, but I love him. But I love him. Do you? Do you? If you're in a relationship with someone right now, and if you're maybe you're not even, you know, doing the thing that makes a human being, But if you're s*xually involved with someone, I challenge you to stop all physical interaction with that person. And if you tell that person that you're gonna stop all physical interaction and they're ticked off or they go, oh, yeah, okay, and then they still come on, they're not concerned about your holiness.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:15:52]:
And Rick Countryman talked about last night, you want to be married to someone who's concerned about your holiness. In fact, the Bible calls our husbands to make sure that the wife is being washed with the water of the word. He's supposed to be your spiritual leader. And if you want to marry somebody that's gonna say, come on, baby, follow me as I follow Christ. If he's drawn you back into that bed, he's not your guy. If you wanna know, you stop all physical interaction and you seek the Lord and you repent and you get on your face, and you ask God to show you through the eyes of the spirit of the most high God, is this someone that you would have me spend my life with? And I know sometimes it's hard. I remember one of the young women that I, news from time she was a little girl. She'd moved in with a guy.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:16:48]:
He was an alcoholic. He was barfing in the you know, she he'd come home after drinking and she's cleaning up his puke, but I love him. I'm like, so what? But I love him. So what? You don't have to spend the rest of your life saddled with this guy that you've moved in with, that you're not married to, and you have all these feelings of love for him. Maybe you do love him and you care about him, but you don't have to spend the rest of your life cleaning up his vomit. Move out, fall on your face, and pursue Christ. But I love him, so what? The next consequence I see is purity lost. First Corinthians six eighteen says, flee fornication.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:17:32]:
Every sin that a man does is without the body, but he that commits fornication sins with his in his own body. You sin against yourself. Satan seduces us and then he shames us. Right? Come on. Don't be a prude. He's awesome. You think you're gonna win that guy forever if you have s*x with him? Nope. That's not how it works.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:17:58]:
Not how it works. See, God created men to pursue and to long for and to and as soon as you put out, he's like, done. That's not how it works. We connect with them physically. I love how Susie explained all the science of that last night. We connect with them with our hearts and our emotions and our minds. Once we've given our bodies to them, there's something that triggers and we're like, I'm yours forever, baby. It doesn't work that way for men.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:18:26]:
Don't believe if I get if I sleep with him, he's gonna stay with me forever. That's not the way it works. Another consequence is s*x before marriage hinders your relationship. It interferes with the development of emotional intimacy because the couples that spend time exploring one another's bodies are not falling in love with each other, with their hopes, their thoughts, their dreams, their minds. It's eros love. See, God wants the best for his girls. My husband is, he has two daughters and two sons. And I could tell you when those girls were dating, that man I mean, somebody walk in the door and he was just like I remember him sitting across from one of our kids that was in our youth group and he was gonna take Meredith to prom.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:19:21]:
And and Steve said, okay. I'm now not your youth pastor. I'm Meredith's dad. I will kill you if you touch my daughter in a s*xual way. You know what? And I know a lot of you don't have dads that do that for you. Find a godly person in your life that will do that for you. I don't care how old you are. My niece just got engaged and she texted Steve and said, hey, I'm getting married.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:19:44]:
And his first response to her was, does he love Jesus more than he he loves you? And she said, yes, he does. You surround yourself with men that are gonna help you guard your purity. God created us with this amazing I don't care if you're a virgin or not. Today, you walk in purity. Today is the day that you, before the Lord, say, I will walk in purity. And then you ask people to help you guard your purity. You ask people in your life to come alongside of you. The next consequence is you will lose your joy.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:20:24]:
So David, king David, I don't know if you know his story. In Psalm fifty one twelve, he said, restore to me the joy of thy salvation. Why did he say that? Because David, the adorable little shepherd boy that Rick was talking about last night, who God said, you're the one that's gonna be king, and he wrote so many of the songs. He was this amazing worship guy. He killed Goliath. He loved God. And we today even fill our lives with worship from the words that David penned so many years ago. And yet, one day, he saw Bathsheba and he wanted to have her.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:21:13]:
And you know, the Bible says that there is no sin that has taken you but such as is common to man, but God will always provide a way to escape. And in that moment, when he saw this woman taking a bath and he told his servant, hey, bring her to me. His little servant had the guts to say, Yemim, Uriah's wife? That was his way of escape. Somebody you surround yourself with people like that, okay, that say, honey, are you sure that you should be going out alone with that guy? Are you sure that's really the one for you? You mean Uriah's wife? God will provide you a way of escape. When I was dating, this is before Steve and I were dating, there was a boy and actually, if any of you have read Real Life Romance, the first story and there's mine and Steve's love story, and I remember this kid, like, getting all up in my business, and I knew I was going farther than I wanted to go and I was not equipped or prepared to stop what was happening. That's my goal today is to equip and prepare you to stop what's happening. And I remember one got in. And the phone in my bedroom rang, and this was back in this is back in the nineteen hundreds, in the olden days.

Speaker C [00:22:31]:
You didn't have a phone and I mean

Rhonda Stoppe [00:22:32]:
it was a big deal to have a phone. Anybody watch The Brady Bunch? Okay. That's my era. There you go. And so the phone in my room, it was plugged into a wall. There was this coil thing. Not cordless. No.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:22:43]:
No. And the phone rang in my bedroom. My parents were in bed asleep, so I'm, like, running in there to get the phone, you know, pushing Joe Schmo off of me. I answered the phone, and it was Stoppie. I call my husband, his name is Steve Stoppie, but there's a million Steve's on the planet. So I call him Stoppie. And it was Stoppie. And he's like, Hey, what are you doing? I'm like, nothing.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:23:04]:
And he had great concern over this guy that I was spending time with. I was infatuated with this guy. He had a nice car. He was the guy any girl would have loved to go out with, and he went out with me. And I was infatuated. And Stoppie said, are your parents in bed? I said, mhmm. He said, I'm a keep you on the phone till he cools off. And finally, I, after I don't remember how long I thought this kid had probably left, I went out and he hadn't left.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:23:36]:
He was right there. And he goes, was that stop you on the phone? I'm like, it actually was. And he said, you don't want to see me anymore, do you? And I said, I don't. God will provide a way of escape. I was in over my head, and I didn't have the maturity to say, dude, I'm not that girl. In fact, I remember when all that was happening, I was thinking, I see how girls become that girl, but God provides a way of escape. See, God's in this with you. He wants to help you guard your purity.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:24:09]:
He wants you to walk in the spirit, and he wants the joy of the Lord to be all over you. And when David sinned with Bathsheba, his joy was gone. The guy that wrote those Psalms, the guy who was all about the joy of the Lord, The joy left him. And Nehemiah eight ten says, the joy of the Lord is your strength. Satan knows that. So if you get stuck in a s*xual sin and you can't break free of it, and maybe it's online, maybe it's not full on having s*x with somebody, but maybe, you know, it used to be you talk to guys about porn and girls, you know, you don't. But I know that women are addicted to porn now too. The Bible says, as a man thinks in his heart, so is he.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:25:02]:
As a woman thinks in his or her heart, so is she. So maybe you're not having s*x with her with him, but maybe you're doing whatever you need to do to satisfy yourself watching something on the on the Internet. You're still sinning, and it's still a s*xual sin. And God can break you free of that. And the joy of the Lord can be restored like David asked. Ephesians two ten, God saved you unto good works that he ordained in advance that you should walk in them. Isn't that cool? Now if you're not saved, if you don't know what saved means, it means you're going to hell in a hand basket without Jesus, and he is our savior who rescues us from our sin. And the Bible says they're dead in our trespasses and sin, but he makes us alive unto Christ.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:25:52]:
You guys, that arm hair is attached. Look at that. You happen to get old. He makes us alive unto Christ, and no longer are we dead. But what happens? Oh, I love Jesus. And then sin starts to sneak in and our joy starts to sneak out. And for some reason, when we had that zeal and passion to tell people about Christ and to be in the word and to be at every fellowship with believers, every opportunity we got. Now all of a sudden, they kind of offend me.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:26:26]:
Well, you know what? I don't really connect with them anymore. You know what? They're not really as cool as they used to be. You've changed because you're not walking in the joy of the Lord. You're not walking in the spirit. Satan comes to steal, kill, and destroy. He wants to eat your lunch, and it's so subtle, and he sneaks in. John ten ten, Jesus said, the thief comes to steal, kill, and destroy. I have come that they, you, may have life and that you may have it more abundantly.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:27:02]:
That's over the top. See, mediocre status quo status quo Christianity sucks. It's not God's plan for you. God's plan is for every single one of us who have given our hearts to Christ to be on fire for him. Does that mean we're always like energy energy and no. Some of you are more energetic and some of you are not. That's cool. You be you, girl.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:27:28]:
But you know that God has saved you unto good works that he's ordained for you in history before you were even born. He knew you would be his, and he has plans he wants to accomplish in and through your life, and Satan wants to steal it. And oftentimes, it's a devil in blue jeans that walks up to your desk at work that says, hey, can I have your number? Oops, can I have your number? And you're like, oh, yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, he says he believes in God. That's not a Christian. The demons believe and tremble. Believing? No.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:28:04]:
John three sixteen, God so loved the world, he gave his only begotten son that whosoever believe in him should not perish but have everlasting life. The word believe means a one point in time action with a continued result. It means it change it's a covenant with God, and he breathes life into your dead heart. Do not date a Christian that believes but does not pursue Christ as the priority relationship of his life. Because if you think you can be his God, you're gonna let him down. And if he's looking for his fulfillment in how you make him feel, that's idolatry. You are not a worthy idol and you know it. And if you're looking to him to make you feel valued, he can't live up to that.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:28:50]:
You'll suck the life out of him. Galatians six seven says, God is not mocked. You will reap what you sow. Hosea eight seven, they that sow the wind and reap the whirlwind. Just a little make out session. You're playing with fire, playing with fire. Satan's lie to Eve in the garden, remember he got her to question God's goodness. See, we oh, if God were good, he'd want me to be married.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:29:25]:
My highest and greatest good is to be a wife and a mother. Is it? Is that your idol? Will you lay that idol at the foot of the cross? Your highest and greatest good is to fall in love with God. In John, Mark twelve thirty, the the religious leaders of the day asked you the religious leaders of the day said, hey, Jesus, what's protos? What's the priority of life? Oh, go light some candles and chant a mantra. Nope. Oh, make sure you go to church every week. Nope. He said, this is simple, that you love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, your whole being, and then you love your neighbor as yourself. The priority of our life is to fall in love with our God.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:30:15]:
Nothing else, no one else should be more important than falling in love with him. How do you do that? How do you fall in love with someone? You have to know their character. How do you learn someone's character? They reveal it. How did God reveal his character? Through the living word of God. I read through the Bible every year in my margins and do this. It's super easy. God's ways, God's will, God's purpose, God's ways, God's character. As you're reading through at the Leviticus, the Exodus, the all those ones that you're just like, oh my goodness.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:30:52]:
Okay. The sacrificial lamb. God's what is God's character? Holiness. You do this. You do this as an atonement because God hates sin, and it needed to be atoned for, and that's why he sent his son. Messing around in the backseat of a car is sin that will kill, steal and destroy you and you'll reap a whirlwind. Maybe you've gone too far. I love, Jillian's story.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:31:33]:
God meets us where we are. He gets it. If you have a relationship with Christ, he has taken our sins as far as East is from the West. The spirit of the most high God tabernacles within you. God indwells you if you have a relationship with him, and if you do not, don't leave this conference without knowing Jesus in a real and genuine way because that's where the life change happens. That's where the joy and the zeal and the passion happens. If you're stuck in guilt, Satan keeps you stuck there. I don't have time to talk about it because I'm running out of time, but abuse, if you've been abused, I'm not talking about that.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:32:21]:
That's someone else's sin against you. That is not what we're talking about. And I I was molested as a child and I can talk to anybody that wants to talk about that later. But know this, that God takes our sins as far as east is from the West. You can travel west all day long and never meet east. Though your sins are as scarlet, he washes us whiter than snow. Satan is ready to condemn us, but second Corinthians ten five says taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. Jesus is ready to forgive you.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:32:56]:
Remember the the prostitute that was wiping Jesus' feet with her hair and tears? And the Simeon, I think his name was, he was looking and like, oh, he's thinking, oh, if Jesus even knew what a slutty woman she is, and Jesus knew his thoughts. He said, let me ask you something. Who loves more? The one who's forgiven much or the one who's forgiven little? Let me tell you something. That woman who's had an abortion, that woman who's been divorced three times, that woman who has come out of a lesbian relationship, that woman who has rebelled and walked in a in her own obedient disobedience to God when she falls on her face and repents and understands the forgiveness? Oh, in the book of Acts, it says, they who've turned the world upside down are here. God turns the world upside down through their zeal and passion and love because they get it. See, when David sinned with Bathsheba, when he finally came to repentance, which he hid his sin for a year and he was miserable, and after he repented and Bathsheba repented, see, Bathsheba was a really willing participant. She didn't get raped by David. She went willingly.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:34:06]:
But when they repented, then God gave David and Bathsheba, Solomon, who would be the next king of Israel, the wisest man who ever lived. David had other wives, but when God forgives, he forgives to the utmost. And he took a woman with a shameful past, and he said, I'm choosing you to raise the next godly king that the entire world is gonna know of his wisdom. That's the God we serve. Why purity matters? God calls us to holiness. Living a holy life is key to enjoying the abundant life. Honorable living is key to becoming a vessel of honor. Walking in holiness is key to seeing God, and we'll end with this.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:34:54]:
Blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see God. That's Jesus' words. The word see God means to gaze with eyes open as something remarkable. Walking in purity is the path to viewing God in wide eyed wonder wonder. Do you do you ever meet somebody that's just like crazy about the Lord? I guarantee you that they are regularly saying, search me, oh God, and know my heart. Try me, know my anxious thoughts. See if there's any wicked way in me and lead me in the way everlasting. They are not keeping sin.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:35:27]:
They're saying nothing is more value to me valuable to me than to gaze at you in wide eyed wonder. And I know it begins with a relationship with Christ and with regularly asking God to help me walk in holiness. Holy living, seeking God, that's where we go. Don't make finding mister so and so your idol. You seek him. You serve him. You walk in purity so you're led by the spirit. You trust his timing.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:36:05]:
Satan got Eve to believe that God wasn't good and got her to eat the fruit. Marry you and then somebody at work shows you attention, he's not really a believer but that's okay. You're believing if you start believing that God's not good or he'd let me have this, that's Satan's lie. Idolatry is a good thing that we want, but we'll send to get it.

Speaker C [00:36:28]:
If you've got something in

Rhonda Stoppe [00:36:29]:
your life you want so badly you'll send to get it, it has become an idol in your life and you need to lay it at the foot of the cross Because the joy of the Lord is your strength. If you want God's discernment to choose wisely, determine to manage your passions. If you have regrets, it's time to repent and be cleansed from the guilt and shame. Because she who was forgiven much loves much. If you want to live in wide eyed wonder for wonder for God, pursue purity as a lifestyle. And a life led by the spirit is empowered by his joy and his zeal and he will do through you exceedingly and abundantly above all you could ask or think. And the spirit of the most high God will give you discernment to choose wisely. Let's pray.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:37:17]:
Father God, wow. Thank you so much. I pray for these women. I pray that your word would go forth, that it will accomplish that for which you have sent it into our hearts and our minds. I pray for purity. I pray for holiness. I pray that we will gaze at you with wide eyed wonder so that Satan cannot seduce us away from our adoration for you. And in your timing and in your goodness, help these women to choose wisely the person you would call them to serve you with for the rest of their lives.

Rhonda Stoppe [00:37:46]:
In Jesus' name, amen. Amen. Thanks, ladies. I think you're going on a break now that we're going. Look at your schedule. How that how's that look at your schedule?